We all know that song. But when it comes down to it, when you are in a state of fear, anxiety, anger and worry, you want to be happy but can’t. Why is that? People don’t realize that they are trying to change their mood the wrong way. We feel before even realizing it. What that means is if someone crosses me or glares at me, my body has a reaction of shock, questioning, etc. and from that bottom feeling, then you start to engage the why. And that is understanding what you are feeling.
So you might ask yourself, ‘Is there something wrong with me? Did I do something to hurt this person?’ So now you are worried. What people do is that they don’t want to worry so they try to be happy. So in their mind they tell themselves there is nothing wrong with them. It’s that person. They are not even looking at me. Trying to change your state from the surface. But still not addressing the initial shock and fear which is happening inside your body first.
So if you really want to be happy, you have to enter the state of the body. If that glare caused you to be worried, that was an experience. You need an experience that makes you happy as opposed to saying and thinking you want to be happy. This is able to master your state. So think of an experience that makes you happy? Playing your favorite song and dancing to it? Scoring the winning goal in a championship game? Etc. [add other examples to be happy] So in being happy, actually feel like kicking the ball into the net for the game, winning a goal, dancing with joy …yell out, scream and jump for joy! I guarantee your state will change. Apply this to a zen and calm grounded state.
In order to do that, you must be aware that you are feeling fear and worry. So you must accept and acknowledge the current state before you are able to change it. Otherwise, it will be a denial of your state, mind and body. If we deny ourselves, we feel even more depressed. Honor yourself in whatever state you are in and thereby having the power to choose to be in any state you want. That is the key. A Choice. An Example. Winning journal. Inclusion of practice here. We are so used to a culture of complaining, blaming, criticizing and judging our lacks that leads to an underline state of constantly feeling not good enough, doubtful. That’s the reason for low self esteem as seen from clients and myself. We are constantly being put in that state. How can anyone achieve anything in that state? That’s why so many people have lost the will to try harder, wanting more. If we are able to acknowledge that state, see ourselves feeling down, neglected, shamed, guilty, imagine yourself seeing yourself as a little child. What would you do? You know what I would do? I would pull the child and ask ‘What’s wrong? What can I help you with? What’s wrong with providing compassion and support. The more you are able to do this, the more the child will open up, trust you and tell you exactly what they need. That is how you acknowledge your state.